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  • Writer's pictureErica

Building a Support System: Learning to Foster Important Relationships.

It's May 2001. The Indiana sky is overcast and the air is chilly. A couple of teenaged girl friends pull up to a frozen custard shop to visit a friend who recently started working there. For one friend, who was fairly new to this area of town, it was her first visit to the shop. The girls step up to the sliding glass window to order. There he was, this friend. He and the new girl lock eyes for a brief second. They flirt a little as he prepares her order that he then drops. Embarrassed, he remakes the order. Although, just meeting, the girl feels an attraction to this guy. She decides to not make much of it. They go on to eventually become really close. Pretty much best friends. They talked all the time. Their friendship helped to shape their lives for years to come.

It's funny really that they grew to become such close friends. They were so different. She was focused and goal-directed while he was laid back and just went with the flow. She was serious about school while it was merely a formality for him at the time. What brought them together, however, was what they shared in common. They both have a great sense of humor, are kind-hearted, and discovered they both want the same things in life. They eventually started dating. Although using the word dating would be a stretch. There was nothing really formal about it. They hung out together and just enjoyed each other's company. Though a relationship is not without its challenges, and they had them, especially being only teenagers. When together, they were totally on the same page. However, when not together, they seemed to not even be in the same book. She was laser-focused on the future and what needed to happen now to get there. He, on the other hand, well, he was not. She did not understand it. Here was this super smart and nice guy, who could do and be anything he put his mind to. He just wasn't putting his mind to it. They toughed it out, although it was not easy for either of them. He felt like she was tripping all the time about him hanging out with friends when she was really just worried but not knowing how to effectively communicate that. She felt like he did not care about his future and their's together when really he was just lost and not knowing how to deal with that. With time and maturity, they grew and learned how to be better partners, eventually marrying. Things just clicked for them.